Saturday, March 31, 2007

9 years and a few days

On Tuesday, it was 9 years since my grandmother passed away.

I've been thinking about her a lot the past few weeks. Knowing that the anniversary of her death was coming up soon, I planned on doing a post on my blog all about her on that day. But, as usual, I forgot about it on Tuesday. I was checking my Aunt's blog today (I haven't checked ANY blogs in about 2 weeks.) and saw her post and it reminded me that I missed the day.

(Here are Grammy and Grampy shortly before they got married)

I miss my Gram terribly. When I was young we were very close. Mom had me when she was quite young, (16) so my grandparents helped out with me a lot. I spent a lot of time with both of them, but as I got older and became a teenager I spent less and less time with my grandparents. I mean, what 16 year old wants to go sit and talk with her grandmother instead of going to a party. lol.

(Here they are on their wedding day)

Like many typical teens I never really listened much when she used to talk about what things were like when she was younger.
I wish I had spent more time listening to her. I miss her voice.
I miss her laugh. She had such a great laugh.

(Gram and Grampy having a good time. I'm not sure when this was taken.)

She raised 5 children

and had 9 grandchildren.

She was such a vibrant woman. And she was so very beautiful.

(l-r: My Great Grandmother Eva, My Grandmother Alma, My Mother Cathy and me I'm guessing sometime in the summer of 1978)

In her later years, she couldn't tell her stories any more. She had some form of dementia. We think it was Alzheimers Disease but we're not 100% sure. She'd start telling some story about a friend or family member, or even herself, and halfway through would have no idea what the ending was. She just couldn't remember. She used to get so frustrated. She knew what she wanted to say, but she just couldn't seem to get it out.

(5 Generations of women - Top row: My mother Cathy and Grandmother Alma, Middle row: My Great Great Grandmother Alma and My Great Grandmother Eva, Bottom center: ME!!)

One day, shortly before she passed away I was visiting with her and she kept making these frustrated noises and patting my arm, but she didn't say anything. I asked her what was wrong and she looked at me and said "I know I love you." She didn't know my name and couldn't remember who I was, but she knew the one thing that mattered. That she loved me and that I was important to her.

(Grampy and Grammy at my Aunt and Uncle's wedding in 1991 I think)

I wish she could have been at my wedding. I wish she could meet my kids. I wish I could talk to her for just one more day. I wish, I wish, I wish... But wishing doesn't really help now, does it? All I can do is remember her as best I can and make sure my kids know about her and love her too.

I Miss you and Love you Gram.

Alma Mary Caissie
May 19 1937 - March 27 1998


Ocean said...

I miss grammy too...I remember that she knew she loved us too, that was the one thing she was sure of.

Christine said...

lol. I just realized when I was looking back at the pictures that in the pic where Gram and Grampy were dancing, he's actually pinching her boob. I never noticed that before. I was always looking at their faces.

Some (but not all) blinkies adopted from:

Others found randomly around the net and put here to use for my own nefarious purposes! Muahahahaha. (*J/K*)